Thursday, May 15, 2008

Celestial Body Image

I woke from a disturbing dream last night that left me too anxious to go back to sleep.

There I was, joyfully wedding a good friend of mine. She and I mingled happily amongst our loved ones.

We looked great and so in love!

Then when the crowd dwindled and the DJ played "Happy Trails" the maks was lifted from our union.

Turns out my friend turned wife was disgusted with my very person!

"You are so fat and gross, I do not even want to touch you!"

Then she said: "You are greasy and gooey!"

And: "Who could ever be attracted to someTHING like you?"

I was crushed and confused. Here I thought we were in love. And big is beautiful! The Cass Eliot episode of Scooby Doo is my favorite!

I woke up from the dream utterly frantic. I shook my poor husband awake and begged him to confirm that I was beautiful and attractive and sexy.

I even went so far as to ask him to list my attractive qualities!

Nothing like being woken up at 4am to validate your love to your wife.

Poor guy. He is so patient with me.

And HE loves me.

And I like boys anyway (sorry girls!).

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